Do you ever feel like you sabotage yourself?
You do the work, get some results and then….you stop.
The excuses, exceptions & justifications start to creep in and before you know it, those results you worked so hard for are no where to be seen.
It creates a ton of frustration.
“What’s wrong with me?
It feels so awesome when I’m making progress, why do I stop trying?
I keep getting in the way of my goals!
Why do I keep doing this?”
There’s actually nothing wrong with you.
There are two things you need to know:
- This is not only normal, but predictable
- If you change your strategy, you can break this cycle
There’s a predictable cycle of change that explains why we stop trying. Understanding it is the first step towards breaking out of it. Here’s what it often looks like:
You get frustrated. You feel bad about your body, habits, finances or life in general. It sucks. Things have to change. You’re motivated to do things differently.
Fueled by this discontent, you start to do the work. Your new behaviors are powered by a strong desire to escape the pain, frustration or other negative emotions.
You start to see results. You recognize progress. That frustration or pain is lessened and now you’re feeling encouraged, hopeful and inspired.
While that’s awesome, this is where things often go wrong. Yes, there’s less pain, less frustration and with that often comes a decreased sense of urgency to do the work.
You aren’t as unhappy so that negative emotion driving your change isn’t as strong.
Enter excuses, exceptions & justifications. You start to make those old choices again. You return to the way things were.
Eventually, you find yourself back at the start. Unhappy, frustrated and believing in yourself less than ever.
Tony Robbins explains that the desire to avoid pain and seek pleasure drives this cycle.
When we are in enough pain, we’ll take action to reduce it.
When the pain decreases, we seek pleasure, often in ways that create more pain.
Once we’ve created more pain again, by seeking pleasure, we have to do the work (over again) to alleviate the pain.
The fundamental issue here isn’t with this pleasure/pain cycle but with our perspective.
We have mis-classified the things that bring pleasure.
It’s not pleasurable to eat to the point of weight gain – that’s pain.
It’s not pleasurable to eat or drink to the point of guilt, frustration, shame or embarrassment.
The key to breaking out of this cycle lies in redefining both pleasure and pain.
I want to help you do this.
I’m hosting a totally free 2-part webinar series where I’ll talk you through exactly where we’re messing up this cycle and how we can break free from it.
To reserve your spot for these free webinars, click here!
I’ll be doing live-coaching on these webinars – don’t miss them! I’ll stay until every single question is answered!
You can end this cycle now! I’m sure of it! Let’s not waste another day!