Year of Push 1.2 What Growth Feels Like

Ready for 1.2? If you have no idea what this blog is, definitely start with this podcast and then read yesterday’s 1.1 post.

I didn’t set my alarm last night (I usually set it for 4:30a) so I woke up at 5 when the coffee grinder went off.

My eyes were a wee bit puffy which is likely from the cup of Halo Top I had last night. I am sooooo sensitive to sugar in all forms but I still indulge from time to time. Puffy eyes be damned.

After my morning routine, I got straight to work. I am dramatically more productive early in the am than any other time of day.

Today is my first real workout at the new gym. It’s broken into 2 parts. First is strength:

5 RM strict press

3 RM push press

3 RM push jerk

“RM” means rep max. Basically, you’re working up to your heaviest weight for those movements at 5 or 3 reps. All of these are barbell movements from shoulder to overhead. I LOVE barbell work. Love it.

We were sharing barbells, which was new to me, because I always workout alone, but all the ladies in the class were commenting about how strong I am. That felt good. I’ve worked hard for this strength (physical & mental).

Next up was an 8 minute AMRAP:

  • 18 cal bike
  • 30 ab-mat situps

AMRAP stands for “as many rounds as possible” so with this workout, I’m trying to go as fast as possible (without sacrificing form, of course) alternating between the assault bike and an abmat on the floor.

I came out hot after the first round on the bike – I was the 2nd girl off the bike. I slowed down a bit after that first round but kept the intensity really high throughout.

I was proud afterwards. As I type this, I’m still on a bit of a high, internally celebrating that I’ve made the right decision to step so far outside my comfort zone.

It’s crazy, comparing this post-workout high to my pre-workout jitters.

before the workout, I sat in my car outside the gym feeling like I was the new kid at school, coming in mid-year when everyone else knows each other, freaking out about whether or not I’ll find my locker or sit alone at lunch.

I wasn’t sure if we’d warm-up together as a class or solo. I didn’t know where to go or if I had to sign in. I didn’t know if they were expecting the new girl or if should announce myself as such.

I kept telling myself to get out of my head and take each moment as it comes. Lots of emotional management before the workout!

The discomfort is why I’m here. The nervousness, the doubt, the insecurity – that’s why I’m here.

This is what growth feels like.

I’m a little bit emotional right now as I think about the guts it took to make this move and what I’ve been through to get to this point.

I called my good friend and former trainer Nathan when I left the gym. He knows how much I despise (fear?) working out with other people and he asked, “Did you make it through a workout with other people? Like real people working out at the same time? In the same space?”

Sure did. Crushed it.

Here’s what I’m reminding myself: there will be days like today where I feel capable in the workouts and go in feeling nervous and leave feeling proud. There will also be days when I go in feeling proud and leave feeling defeated. Some days will be harder than today. Some will be easier. There will be days I feel like I belong and days I feel like I don’t.

What matters is that I keep showing up, pushing through the hard moments, savoring the great ones and always doing my best.

On the food front:

I drank black coffee all morning and when it ran out (sad trombone), I switched to La Croix water (grapefruit flavor).

I felt a little hungry around 8am but what I’ve learned is that my initial wave of hunger (usually the first couple of waves) fades really fast. By 8:20, I wasn’t hungry anymore so I kept on working.

I started to feel truly hungry around 10am so I had a Paleo Power Meals bacon & egg muffin. I’m glad to have a little fuel in my system before my workout. (If you guys want to try Paleo Power Meals, make sure to use the coupon code ebprimal20 to save 20% on your first order!)

After I ate, I headed to Starbucks for the sake of seating (I was tired of sitting on the floor – furniture isn’t coming for another several days). I sipped on an Americano while knocking out some work before heading to the gym. I’m nervously excited for my workout today!

It’s 2pm and I just finished my workout – I have a bit of reflux and I think it’s the combo of so much coffee + the workout. I need some veggies in my life.

I’m super jittery from excitement and relief (not caffeine, I’m used to that) so I need to get out of here and do some exploring. The work can wait. While I’m exploring, I’m gonna find some veggies.

Random side note about me – I’m a major cheap skate. While I was out running errands and thinking about where I’d stop to eat (Chipotle, Whole Foods) I talked myself into coming home to eat. I always remind myself, “It’s not how much money you make, it’s how much money you keep.” I have a fridge & freezer full of Paleo Power Meals. No need to grab food while I’m out!

I came home around 3 and ate pickled brussels sprouts and Paleo Power Meals chicken & broccoli. I feel much better now. I’m calm, happy & ready to get back to work!

I’m an early-bird-special girl. I eat dinner early because I try not to eat late and I strive to get to bed early. Around 6p I had yet another Paleo Power Meal (nope, this isn’t a commercial, but I bought a ton of them and I think they’re delish. Tonight was the spaghetti squash with meat sauce – I added a little goat cheese.

Between work, my workout & the emotional ups and downs of the day – I’m super beat. My goal is to be in bed by 9:30 tonight.

Love you guys and as much as I love you, I believe in you even more!

Create a life you love.


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6 replies
  1. Jason G
    Jason G says:

    Way to crush it! Just remeber, every person in that gym had a first day too. You earned the right to be there! Be proud! Thanks for sharing!

    Reply

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