Episode 077: How To Stop Self Sabotage

Episode 077: How To Stop Self Sabotage

For most of us, certainly for me, the key to achieving and maintaining your weight loss goals is in understanding how to stop self sabotage. It’s in your ability to understand how you get in your own way, how you routinely sabotage your efforts (consciously or unconsciously) and then changing your behavior accordingly. This is far easier said than done but it is 100% possible if you’re willing to pay attention, be honest with yourself and acknowledge that you have everything it takes to improve your life and change your behavior.

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How To Stop Self Sabotage

  • Change your focus. What you focus on you feel
  • Understand that describing is prescribing
  • Be so careful about the words that follow the statement, “I am…”
  • Acknowledge that negative self talk reinforces the very behavior you’re trying to change
  • Learn to stop listening to yourself and start talking yourself by using constructive, truthful affirmations
  • Stop justifying your choices with your circumstances
  • Be more committed to fixing than defending
  • Do not argue for your limitations

Resources

Overcoming Emotional Eating & Self-Limiting Behaviors

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Episode 077: How To Stop Self Sabotage

Episode 076: How to Increase Energy

In today’s episode we’re talking how to increase energy with specific food choices. There are specific strategies (beyond caffeine and sleep) that will make a significant difference in your energy levels, focus and performance. We’ll talk about the dos and don’ts of increasing your energy and talk about food choices that can help boost your energy.

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Food is the raw material your body uses for every single function and operation. We need to think more strategically about low energy signals from our bodies and what the body really needs. Stimulants like caffeine and sugar should never be the first line of defense.

How to Increase Energy (the how and why is detailed in the episode)

  • Skip the carbs in the morning
  • Make sure you’re getting enough protein
  • Eat high quality fats
  • Drink more water and/or eat foods with high water content
  • Monitor your caffeine consumption
  • Never eat sugar on its own
  • Deep breaths (no seriously, this can significantly impact your energy)
  • Choose foods rich in B-vitamins (a discussion of supplementation in the episode)
  • Get plenty of omega-3 fatty acids

Resources

More on omega 3s

Why you should reserve your carbs for the night

The Golden Rules of carbs & fat loss

Carb Strategies for Sustainable Fat Loss

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Episode 077: How To Stop Self Sabotage

Q&A 24: The Gap Between Planning and Doing

In today’s episode we’re addressing a listener challenge that, to me, points to the gap between planning and doing. Maybe you recognize this pattern: you establish a plan. You set goals. You draft a menu for the week. You pre-determine how many workouts you’ll get in. You stock up on healthy groceries. You don’t execute. The groceries go to waste. You don’t make it to the gym. You bring home takeout after working late. The next week, you go back to the same process. You refine your plan. You make it more specific. You spend more time on the plan than on the execution of the plan.

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Listener challenge: I want to lose weight. I need to lose weight. I know what I need to change and what I need to improve. I feel like I’m always setting out to start, getting all prepared and then never making the leap to execute the changes. Can you help? What is wrong with me? Can you help me get motivated?

Response Highlights

Identify the excuses you make for inaction.

Your inner beliefs trigger failure before it happens ~ Marshall Goldsmith

Don’t let your excuses justify inaction

Sacrificing the future on the altar of today ~ Peter Drucker

Evaluate the gap between what you plan and what you do

Be a better executer. Don’t keep returning to the plan. The plan doesn’t get you results

Is the action I’m about to take helpful, harmful or neutral?

Resources

Triggers by Marshall Goldsmith

The ONE Thing by Gary Keller

Overcoming Emotional Eating & Self-Limiting Behaviors

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How to Track (without monitoring calories)

I lost 140 lbs without counting calories or carbs. Honestly, I found that exhausting. I also found it exhausting to use apps where I had to search a database for a food and wonder if it was “close enough” to what I was actually eating. I had done the calorie counting thing before. Sure, I had lost weight but never kept it off. Thank God I finally realized (and understood) exactly why calorie counting is so inaccurate and misleading.

I needed to start paying attention to how foods made me feel. Which foods satisfied my hunger and which didn’t. Were there specific foods or types of foods that led to out-of-control cravings? What strategies led to the most significant fat loss? What contributed to weight gain or plateaus? What behaviors or food choices became more challenging when I was tired, stressed or emotional?

Getting answers to these questions was absolutely critical for lasting fat loss. I knew how to lose weight fast and put it back on. I didn’t want that anymore. I wanted permanent results. I was willing to work for the progress but I didn’t want to pile the weight back on ever again.

I learned that fat loss is about hormones. It’s our hormones that determine whether we’re in fat burning mode or fat storage mode. It’s our hormones that trigger hunger. It’s our hormones that trigger cravings. It’s our hormones that impact the quality and duration of our sleep. And I understood that my hormones were signaling me all day long but I wasn’t paying attention.

I wanted to find answers. I wanted to understand my body. I knew that the key to lasting fat loss was just that: listening to my body and responding strategically instead of reacting instinctively.

I started tracking. I tracked on paper. I made note of what I ate, how much, when and my hormonal biofeedback. Over time, I’ve refined the way I track and it is now a non-negotiable part of my process with my 1:1 coaching clients. We all track. This is where we find answers. This is where we make progress. Inside this document is everything we need to know about trials, opportunities, what works, what doesn’t and what we need to adjust to get significant, sustainable results.

Because I talk about it so often on the podcast, I get a ton of questions about how to track. What should you monitor? What should you use to keep track of things? What format do I use? Can you see an example?

I’m going to tackle all those questions and then some today! If there’s something I leave out, don’t hesitate to email me and ask! The best way to get in touch with me is by getting on the free VIP email list. That way, you’ll have easy access direct to my inbox but you’ll also get my fave recipes, workouts, motivations and more. I digress. Let’s tackle your questions about how to track.

Food

You’ll want to keep track of what you eat, how much and when. I don’t recommend calorie counting, carb counting or tracking macros. For more information on why I think counting calories or macros is misleading, definitely listen to episode 62 of the podcast.

I know that if you’ve ever counted calories, carbs or macros you are probably resistant to tracking. You probably think it takes a lot of time and energy. It does not. This shouldn’t take more than a couple of minutes each day. Everyone has a couple minutes. If you want results, you need to make this a priority. By keeping track of what you eat, how much and when, you’ll identify really important patterns that offer clues and keys to sustainable fat loss.

All you need to do is jot down what you put in your mouth, approximately how much (you do not need to measure) and what time you ate.

Biofeedback

This is probably the hardest part but also the most important. When I talk about biofeedback I’m referring to things including:

  • Quality of sleep – Did you fall asleep and stay asleep? Sleep like a rock? Toss and turn? Wake up tired?
  • Mood
  • Energy
  • Cravings
  • Hunger
  • Focus

People have a difficult time knowing how to track this and when. Oftentimes, they’ll say they don’t notice anything significant or don’t know how to quantify it. Here’s what I recommend: make note of what DOES stand out. When you’re really hungry, you know it. When you have extreme cravings, you know it. When you are totally exhausted and want to put your head down for a nap, you know it. Make note of the extremes. Rate them on a scale of 1-10 and jot down the time.

So for example, if your energy is a 2 on a scale of 1-10 at 3pm, just note that. If you are furiously angry at 7pm, rate it and note it. These extremes, in either direction, provide very valuable information.

If you find yourself going through the day and thinking, “nothing stands out!!” don’t worry about it. Like I said, when you’re super hungry (or have no appetite), you’ll know. When your energy is crazy high or really low, you’ll know. The extremes will stand out. Pay attention and make note.

Sleep

This one is pretty simple. Sleep is significantly impacted by your hormones and your hormones have a massive impact on fat loss. When you wake up, make a quick note of approximately how much sleep you got and the quality of your sleep. If you were tossing and turning all night, write that down. If you slept like a rock, indicate that, too. If you hardly slept at all or crashed for 12 hours, just write a quick summary of your night’s sleep.

Your ONE Thing

Pick one thing, one goal or focus for the day. Initially, your one thing might just be tracking. Writing down what you eat and monitoring your biofeedback. Maybe your one thing is to eat a fat loss friendly breakfast. Maybe your one thing is to prioritize sleep. Pick just one focus, one goal for the day. Tackle it as early in the day as possible, if possible.

Activity

If you get in a workout, big or small, write down what you did and for how long.

Thoughts & Associations

You can spend as much or as little time here as you want. Some days you might just track your food and biofeedback and that’s fine. Other days, this might serve as a bit of a journal. You might write about how a stressful day at work contributed to less-than-stellar choices for dinner. You might note that you woke up feeling lean and strong and you’re so glad to be making progress towards your goals! Over time, you’ll learn what is significant and what you want to keep track of.

When my clients share a big win or significant challenge during our calls, I encourage them to go back into their document and write about it. For example, if they’re feeling proud that they sat through a meeting and weren’t tempted by the cookies on the table (which they normally eat 2 or 3 of), that marks a really significant improvement. Those wins should be captured. Eventually, patterns will emerge. Certain ways of eating reduce cravings and reduced cravings lead to these kinds of wins.

Similarly, if you’re beating yourself up, feeling frustrated or like it’s just not worth it, it’s worth capturing those sentiments, too. You don’t have to spend 20 minutes writing, but a few sentences about your thoughts and feelings about your day, your food choices, etc – it provides super important information.

I was recently talking to a coaching client who was feeling like change is really hard. She was struggling. She hadn’t been making great choices. She was kinda down on herself. Because she had been tracking for months, we were able to point out a really important pattern: during periods where she was making great choices and making progress towards her goals, she never felt like it was hard. In fact, when she was making great choices and resisting temptation, she would write about how easy it felt. How much energy she had. How excited she was and how proud she felt of her progress.

But, when she was making not-so-great choices, she’d write about frustration, disappointment and how hard it is to change. It was making poor choices that was hard. Once she shifted back to make good choices, it felt easier. It was only when she wasn’t doing the work that doing the work felt hard. It was the energy required in thinking about it that overwhelmed her. Not in actually doing it.

Recognizing and understanding those powerful patterns can be the a huge stepping stone. You’ll only see them if you track.

Progress

You guys know how I feel about this. You’ve got to have objective information to go along your food and biofeedback monitoring. My clients routinely update their tracking document with:

  • their body weight
  • waist and hip circumference
  • progress pictures

Many of my clients go through periods where they feel like they aren’t making progress but when they take a progress picture, the results are clear. Major fat loss. Be sure to take your pictures in the same clothes so you have similiar comparisons.

Add your weight, measurements and progress pictures into your document no less than every two weeks. Your pictures won’t lie. When you hit a rough patch, you can look back through your document and see what mindsets, food habits and sleep schedules produced the greatest results based on your pictures and your measurements. Do not skip this part!!!

Examples of How to Track

Personally, I love Google docs for tracking. I don’t like apps that require calorie tracking. It’s cumbersome to find the right food and I think it puts your focus on the wrong things like calories and macros.

Google docs is totally customizable and super convenient. You can access your doc from your computer, tablet or phone. It syncs automatically so a morning update from your computer will be reflected when you open the app on your phone later.

Within the Fat Loss Fast Track, we use a daily journal and I’m happy to share the a sneak peak inside the winter 2018 journal with you!

Whether you use Google docs, a paper journal, an existing app or a post-it note – it really doesn’t matter. Do what is easiest for you. Do what you can continue to do with ease. Some of my clients take pictures of what they eat and upload those into their doc. Some literally write down notes on a post-it and upload a pic of their post it at the end of the day. The method doesn’t matter as much as the commitment commitment to paying attention and staying accountable. It makes a difference.

The 100th Episode – The Factors of Failure and the Strategies for Success

The 100th Episode – The Factors of Failure and the Strategies for Success

This is the 100th episode of the Primal Potential podcast! In this episode, I’m sharing some specifics about the factors that led to my emotional eating, weight gain and unhealthy relationship with food as well as the strategies I used to permanently overcome the factors that held me back for most of my life.

To help celebrate the 100th episode I’ve made available 100 coupons each for 2 of my most powerful e-courses. These two e-courses represent the most significant lessons and strategies that helped me beat obesity, lose 140 lbs and transform my life.

The first, Overcoming Emotional Eating and Self-Limiting Beliefs will help any and all of you who have negative or destructive beliefs about yourself or your ability to reach your goals. If you don’t believe you can change then you can’t. Yes, fat loss is 90% nutrition but your food choices are 90% mental. It’s not about what you eat but rather why you eat. This course will help you overcome the  mental constructs that repeatedly hold you back and keep you in the cycle of yo-yo dieting. It also includes guided meditations to help you stay present and settle down all the noise in your mind that gets in your way. Use the coupon code “100”.

The second course delivers the most high-impact anti-diet fat loss strategies. It boils down fat loss to the most significant and effective changes you can implement. It teaches you the Golden Rules of Carbs & Fat Loss, helps you understand the nuances of carb timing, quantity, quality, how to improve your carb tolerance, recipes, meal ideas and more. Use the coupon code “100”.

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Please never forget that this podcast exists to help you reach your goals. I want to know what you need, I want to know what you’re struggling with and I want to help you overcome all the obstacles that are holding you back. I’d love it if you’d get on the free VIP email list so you can email me your questions, suggestions and challenges any time. I will respond and I want to help.

Understanding the challenges and experiences that contributed to my weight gain and unhealthy relationship with food are important. Understanding and overcoming them was a critical component of my success. Hopefully, sharing my struggles will help you understand and identify yours. Hopefully it will help you avoid making some of those mistakes with your own kids. In this episode I share

  • How I developed a negative association with exercise
  • The factors that contributed to sneaking food and overeating
  • How I developed the belief that I was just “the big girl”
  • How I tried to compensate and apologize for my weight

More importantly, I share how I overcame those negative mindsets and redefined  my relationship with food. I share the primary strategies and mindsets that allowed me to end 20+ years of yo-yo dieting and completely reclaim my life.

  • Eliminating negative self talk
  • Staying in the present moment
  • Not allowing myself to be overwhelmed by the future and the length of the journey
  • Making small changes
  • Avoiding all or nothing thinking
  • Practicing gratitude, optimism and empowerment

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