I Think You Need To Calm Down…

by | May 4, 2018 | Blog

Last Sunday I sent out an email to my free VIP list that got a huge response, in part because I was poking fun at my silly self! There’s lots to laugh at, for sure! If you aren’t yet on the VIP list, you can get on it here.

If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click play. Otherwise, keep reading below. 

Most of us are letting way too much get under our skin. We’re wound too tight. There’s unnecessary drama over food, body size, relationships, minor annoyances and work. It’s taking something from all of us – joy, peace, happiness, confidence, connection…

I started thinking more about this a month or two ago when Neghar Fonooni posted on Instagram about the qualities she looks for in friends & romantic partners. One thing in particular jumped out at me.

She said she wants people who remind her that lightness and frivolity are always available to her.

Let’s pause for a second and define frivolity, shall we?

Frivolity: lack of seriousness; lightheartedness

It’s always available to you. In every moment! You don’t have to get so irritated. You don’t have to get so mad. You don’t have to be annoyed. You don’t have to react emotionally to every turn in your day.

Lightness and frivolity are always available to you!

The other day, someone reached out to me on Instagram with the following question:

What does it look like when you have a bad food day? Do you ever have a bad day? You always sound so motivated and positive. I’m guessing you don’t feel like talking about it if you have bad days or that you have become so strong you’re able to avoid them. I know you used to binge a lot, have you ever had a replapse since you stopped? How do you avoid it in bad times? How do you turn it around? 

I’m going to go much deeper into this answer on Monday’s podcast (episode 478) but here’s the short answer:

I have bad days. However, food choices do not make my days good or bad. Do I indulge? Yes. Do I ever overindulge? Yes. Does that make my day bad? No! Does eating clean make my day good? No!

I’m not going to let something like a cupcake or a margharita influence my joy and happiness.

I want to invite you to consider the same option.

If you’ve been part of the Primal Potential family for a while, you’ve probably heard me share that one of my personal mantras is travel light.

When I start to get frustrated, annoyed, stressed or sad, I remind myself to travel light – to not take things so seriously. It’s okay to shrug it off! It’s okay to laugh at yourself! It’s okay to laugh at other people! I don’t have to CHOOSE to be flustered by this. I don’t have to stir up drama in my thoughts & responses because lightness and frivolity are always available to me.

And to you.

Well…here comes the hysterical irony of my weekend…

I was SO excited because my friend Sarah, who owns an adorable company on Cape Cod called Seasouled, made me a custom sign so I can be reminded to travel light all the time. (Actually, I bought two – the other one says “good vibes only” – I couldn’t resist! I need that reminder, too!)

“Travel light” reminds me to CHOOSE not to stir up drama. It reminds me to let things go. It reminds me to not take myself or others so seriously.

I was all excited to hang up the sign in the house. I got my measuring tape, marked off the center point, grabbed a hammer and nail. With the first gentle tap of the hammer, I cracked the window. Then, I cracked it again!

In that moment, I couldn’t stop laughing at the immediate need to be reminded to travel light! I could have been all upset, pissed off, victim-of-my-circumstances. “I can’t believe how my day started!!

Or, I could laugh. It’s a window. It’s not that serious.

Just an hour later I was running out to get coffee and water for my boyfriend and his uncle, who were doing some construction work for me. My car was parked in a different place than normal and I went to pull out and drove straight into a tree stump.

Again: an opportunity to travel light. I was fine. The car was fine.

I could choose to laugh or I could choose to whine and complain about what a crappy day I was having.

It wasn’t a bad day. In fact, it was a pretty funny day.

Boy oh boy do I need that “travel light” reminder! Perfect timing!

We all need these reminders. We can’t just think about it and intend to improve. We need reminders so we don’t just repeatedly return to our automatic, normal, stressed, anxious, frustrated patterns.

I don’t care what you choose as your reminder – it can be as beautiful & decorative as a custom sign from Seasouled or it can be as simple as a post it note on your mirror. It can be a keychain or a tattoo but do SOMETHING to remind yourself that lightness & frivolity are ALWAYS available to you.

The Primal Potential Podcast

Download a free chapter from Chasing Cupcakes.

Enter your first name and email below and I'll send over chapter nine from my best-selling book. 

Thanks! Check your inbox.