TOUGH LOVE – Are You For Real?

by | Aug 24, 2017 | Blog

We are addicted to talking about our problems. We complain about everything. We even complain about our blessings! Seriously! We complain about things that we should be purely grateful for: our loved ones, our jobs, having to care for our homes, the abundance of food we have in our homes.

PLEASE: STOP. It’s old, it’s tired, no one wants to hear it & it’s only taking away from your happiness.

If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click here to listen on Anchor.

I want to be a crusader against complaining, negativity, and parading your blessings as burdens.

You are creating a black cloud over your life and the life of everyone who hears you. You are preventing your own joy and manufacturing problems because of your attitude.

Look, I’m not a saint. I have negative thoughts. I complain. But I am fighting hard to completely eliminate that from my life & my business.

I frequently catch myself complaining (usually in my thoughts) about how busy I am. First of all: the things that keep me busy are choices. I don’t have to go to the gym, I choose to. I don’t have to write a daily blog, I choose to. I don’t have to launch 8 podcasts a week, I choose to. I don’t have to respond to every email I get, I choose to.

I remind myself of the millions of people who don’t have work. Of the people who want to own a business and are struggling to get their first customer. Who can’t afford a gym membership or who desire the level of discipline I have to go each day.

The same is true for you. You choose to have your kids involved in sports. You could make a different choice if it is truly a burden. You choose to stay up late watching Netflix & reading people’s updates on Facebook. You choose to have those cookies late at night that you complain about the next day.

Please, let’s stop.

When I first separated from my ex-husband, I was in a dark, dark place. My heart was broken in several pieces. I felt abandoned by several people in my life. I was afraid for my business. I was afraid for my finances. I was alone. I was sad.

There were multiple times where I found myself crying on the floor and then realized that many people would give just about anything to have my worst day. My worst day would easily be their best. You know, people without a family, without a roof over their heads, who don’t know where their next meal is coming from, who are facing a terminal illness.

Even on my worst day, my life is amazing. It’s a gift. And I’m done complaining about it. 

For most of my life, I complained about my body and my lack of self-control with food. I’m so disgusting. What is wrong with me? Why can’t I change?!!

Dude. I CAN change.

I will not complain about circumstances that I am creating!

I’ll either change my behavior or I’ll change my attitude.

There will be things in life that you cannot change. Why would you choose to victimize yourself over choices you’re creating!?

That’s like being miserable because you’re locked in a room to which you hold the key. Unlock the door and walk out or stop making yourself miserable over your choice.

Life is good. Life is great.

I am crusading against negativity & complaining. I hope you’ll join me.

My workout today was a great example of practice in real-time. I didn’t sleep well last night. I had nightmares (again) all night. When my alarm went off at 4:45am I didn’t want to get up. And, I need to leave at 3am tomorrow for the airport, so I started justifying getting more sleep today in preparation for tomorrow & skipping the workout altogether.

I literally began to make myself feel like a victim because I have to be up super early tomorrow…for a fun weekend away!

Dude. No. No way. That will not happen.

I decided to go back to sleep for another couple hours and then wake up and hit the gym a bit later than normal and refuse any future thought of complaint or negativity about being tired. I can go to bed early tonight. I have a comfortable bed. I’m going away for the weekend.

There is no need for negativity.

The workout wasn’t the best and I’ll tell you why. You know how my knee was injured for a few weeks? Well, I basically worked out my shoulders every day for several weeks. No bueno. My knee is soooooo much better but I’ve aggravated my shoulder.

It would be easy to slip into a complaint like “seriously?! If it’s not one thing it’s another.” No. I refuse to think that way. I have 2 healthy arms and 2 healthy legs.

Plus, I learned an important lesson about overtraining. That’s a tool in my toolbox and I’m grateful for it!

Besides, I didn’t hurt it badly – nothing awful happened – it’s just a little sore and I need to take it easy on shoulders for a bit to let the inflammation come down.

All that to say I had to modify today’s workout.

Here’s how it was written:

Teams of 4-5:
5:00 at each station:
Prowler Push
Sled Pull
Ski Erg
Tire Flip
Yoke Carry

Instead of sled pull I rowed. Instead of ski erg I did sit-ups. Not ideal, but still a workout!

On the food front:

I worked out later than normal today so I had breakfast before the workout. Cabbage salad bowl with raw cabbage, bacon, egg & Primal Kitchen Chipotle Lime Mayo.

Since I’ll be traveling tomorrow and not able to workout, I’m keeping the food a bit lighter today & tomorrow. I had an early dinner of a salad from Chipotle Mexican Grill – lettuce, chicken, guacamole & salsa.

Don’t forget: no complaining! No negativity! Make positivity louder!

The Primal Potential Podcast

Download a free chapter from Chasing Cupcakes.

Enter your first name and email below and I'll send over chapter nine from my best-selling book. 

Thanks! Check your inbox.