My workout sucked today. It happens sometimes. Today seemed worse than normal.
If you follow me on Facebook you might be wondering why I only comment about my workouts when they suck. Well, that’s because it’s easy when it’s easy. Nobody needs to understand that a great workout feels great. Or that eating healthy when it feels easy to do so is fun.
We need to be better at making it through the times that AREN’T fun or easy. So that’s why I share my shitty workouts. Because they’re shitty. And shitty isn’t a reason to quit or beat yourself up. It’s just a shitty workout or a shitty choice and shitty things happen.
What we do when shitty things happen or we make shitty choices is the difference between success and the person who chooses easy.
Anyways, back to the workout…
It’s probably a combination of training hard + being a little tired + working a wee bit more than I ought to, but the reasons don’t matter.
I was not a happy camper this morning.
Here’s how it went down:
This morning before my workout I logged into the document where my trainer puts my workouts to see what was on the schedule. The strength part of the workout had been modified since I looked yesterday. Scaled back. I checked the revision. Yup, he removed something.
My defensiveness should have been a red flag but it wasn’t. I texted him. “Why da change?”
He texted back, “How you have felt the last two days [workouts were tough], rest the quads a bit but still get the deadlift work in”.
That kinda set my intention to go in and prove him wrong. Prove I didn’t need it scaled back. In short, my ego went into overdrive.
In hindsight, I was sore & I was tired. #thategotho
We did a few warm up reps on the deadlift. As it go heavier he said, “Do 3 there. We’ll go up once more for your working weight”
Those 3 reps were tough. I set the weight down and he said, “We’ll stay right there for today”
Inner lion roars.
I didn’t fight back. I did my lifts.
Now onto the heart of the workout: KB swings, thrusters & wall walks.
I felt like I left my muscles at home. It was miserable. He looked unhappy, concerned or both. I got in my head.
Incessant inner monologue during the workout goes a little something like this, on warp speed:
I’m letting him down. I’m letting me down. Is this all mental? Push harder. You’re getting weaker. I choose to make this fun & easy. Don’t quit. Am I weak bc I’m focusing on the pain? Imagine this is a PVC pipe. Ok bad idea, you almost threw your shoulder out on that rep. Holy hell why is this so hard today? I’m embarrassed. I choose to make this fun and easy. Is he mad? Push harder. Control your breathing. Don’t quit. I choose to make this fun & easy. This isn’t fun or easy. Keep going. You’re almost there. Where are my muscles? What did I eat yesterday? I should have eaten this morning. I choose to make this fun & easy.
I finished. I wasn’t graceful. I wasn’t happy. I felt defeated. Like the weights won & I lost.
The weights definitely think they won.
But here’s the thing: EVERY time I don’t quit, I win. Every time I face what is hard, I win. Every time I decide not to make excuses, I win.
So when your day sucks, keep going.
When your mood sucks, keep going.
When your motivation sucks, keep going.
Just keep going.
That doesn’t mean every day is going to feel easy. It doesn’t mean that every workout will be crushed. It doesn’t mean that every choice will be perfect or every effort will be 100%. But keep going.