I had a call with a Fat Loss Fast Track client yesterday. It was a tough call. I thought about her all night – how I could help, how I could talk about the situation differently, in a way she might be willing & able to hear.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click here to listen on Anchor. Please note that Anchor is not the Primal Potential Podcast, it’s a short form audio channel where I share these blogs and other personal updates.
We intended to air our conversation as a coaching podcast, but as we wrapped up, I let her know I felt it was a very personal call and, out of respect for her journey, we’d keep the recording between us.
Instead, I’m turning it into a blog. Hahahaha. Just kidding, just kidding. C’mon. That was funny. 🙂
I will, however, share the big picture of the challenge she’s facing as well as her perspective and mine. I want to make sure all of you avoid this mental trap.
The simple backstory: she’s not seeing results and she thinks she should be. She was clearly frustrated & feeling defeated. She said things like:
I don’t understand why it’s not working.
I should be seeing results.
I should have lost a good amount of weight by now.
The changes I’ve made are significant enough for results.
I gently explained to her that what she thinks “should” happen is irrelevant. In fact, it’s a distraction.
There are only two options:
Argue for the way you think things should be.
Respond to the way things are.
As unemotional as that is, those really are the only two options.
I let her know that I was there to help her look at the way things are & identify adjustments that will produce results.
She responded by making a case for why she should be seeing results already – how her body should have changed.
I can relate to the perspective. We make changes, we put in some work, we feel proud of ourselves and then, with good intentions, feel entitled to results.
Guys, it doesn’t matter how it should be. Nothing good can come from using your energy for how reality doesn’t match your expectations.
All that exists is the way things are. We can’t be romantic or emotional about the way things should be. Well, we can be, but it certainly won’t help. In fact, it’s probably going to hold us back.
It’s purely a mental construct – an emotional projection based on assumptions and expectations. It’s not real. Let it go.
I reminded her again – you’re not doing anything to create the results you want when you are emotionally tied to the problem – the challenge – or your sense that you deserve results.
Her feelings are real, but they don’t move the needle. They keep her anchored to the problem.
It’s like arguing that you SHOULD have more money saved up because you’ve gone to college, you have a good job and established a budget.
Okay. That’s cool. But you don’t. So, now what?
We have to deal with reality – the way things are and what we’re able and willing to do to change them today.
We’re emotional creatures, for better or worse.
This perspective of how things should be without a committment to evaluating what you will do about the way things are sets you up for failure.
In this client’s case, she was using this story about how she should be seeing results to justify indulging & overeating. Because, if she should see results and she’s not, what’s the point?
Now, not only is she not moving forward, she’s using her frustration to choose her way even further from her goals!
She agreed, but once again went back to why she should be getting results with the changes she’s made.
Alternatively, when you focus on the way things are and what you’re able and willing to do to change them, you’re removed from that story of “what’s the point? It’s not working anyway.”
If you feel stuck, ask yourself if your perspective has you focused on the present, the past or the future. Ask yourself if your perspective is on what you can do now or next. If it’s not, try that on for size.
Based on where you are now, what can you adjust to move in the direction of your goals? What action can you take today?
My car is having some maintenance done & I was supposed to get it back yesterday. However, they called to let me know they’d have to keep it overnight. So: I took an Uber to the gym. No excuses. There’s always a way. Working out is what I do in the morning and if you want a solution, you’ll find one.
Because I wasn’t sure what the response time of Uber would be in the morning where I live, I ended up getting to the gym about an hour early. No worries. I sat beside the workout floor with my laptop & got work done.
Sooo……that 150 feet of walking lunges got spicy QUICKLY. The whole workout felt like a rest from the lunges! Holy toledo am I gonna feel those tomorrow!
On the food front:
I had a doctor’s appointment today at 10:30am and decided not to eat before then just in case. I didn’t think there’d be any testing required, but I wanted to be in a fasted state on the off chance it was required.
Afterwards, I went out to lunch at Chipotle. I had a salad with steak, guacamole and a little cheese.
I stayed busy through the afternoon & into the evening but took a break to enjoy a completely random dinner…I’m not sure anyone else would like this meal but I certainly did:
Two mahi burgers (frozen style from Trader Joes) each topped with a little bit of Primal Kitchen Chipotle Lime Mayo & a fried egg. I think I would have liked it better if it was a chicken, turkey or beef burger, but it was still tasty.
In October 2019, our relationship with Thrive Market changed. They decided to put their marketing dollars in avenues outside of podcasting but we still think they’re a good choice if you’re looking to save money on health & personal care products.
And no – I am NOT a paid spokesperson for this chipotle mayo, haha, I just really think it’s delish & use it with protein & veggies on the regular!
Don’t forget! The final Fat Loss Fast Track of 2017 kicks off on October 1st and I’m opening up registration to the wait list on Thursday September 14th. If you’re interested, make sure you’re on the wait list.
In today’s episode I’m talking with one of my current Fat Loss Fast Track clients. For the first weeks, she was struggling to see results. But, in the two weeks prior to our chat, she had lost 5 pounds.
I asked her what changed. She said, “I started really paying attention to my hunger.”
Guys, hunger is so major.
Sometimes, as was the case for this client, when we’re eating healthy or fat loss friendly foods, we feel entitled to results. We get emotional about it.
“I’m eating healthy! Why isn’t the scale moving!”
Because you’re giving your body fuel when it doesn’t need it.
Sure, when you feel like snacking you’re choosing veggies and hummus instead of chips & dip but the reality is this: you’re giving your body more fuel than it needs.
Extra fuel, regardless of the type, gets stored. There’s no emotion about it. You don’t “deserve” results.
Today we’ll chat about understanding hunger, the common sense approach to knowing when you need more fuel and snacks that don’t work.
To see the snacks I recommend in today’s episode, see below.
To join the Fall Fat Loss Fast Track Wait List, click here.
In October 2019, our relationship with Thrive Market changed. They decided to put their marketing dollars in avenues outside of podcasting but we still think they’re a good choice if you’re looking to save money on health & personal care products.
Months ago I found a beautiful quote on Instagram and have shared it a couple times since. It says “starve what keeps you stranded. Feed what makes you fly“.
It instantly reminded me of a quote, albeit in a very different tone, from someone I deeply admire: billionaire investor & undeniable genius Charlie Munger.
Speaking about the investment success he’s had with his partner Warren Buffett he says,
It is remarkable how much long-term advantage we have gotten by trying to be consistently not stupid instead of trying to be very intelligent.
Let’s go back to the first, more eloquent quote…
Starve what keeps you stranded. Feed what makes you fly.
What makes you feel stranded, stuck or isolated? What choices lead to those end points?⠀
Seriously, sit down and make a list of the choices, thoughts & behaviors that make you feel those ways.
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For me, it’s over-eating, over-indulging, procrastination, thinking negatively & focusing on problems instead of solutions.
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Once you have your list of choices, thoughts or behaviors that leave you feeling stranded, frustrated or defeated, ask yourself what it means to starve those things.
To give them no energy, attention or time. What does that look like for you?
That’s the part that makes me think of the Munger quote:⠀ ⠀
⠀ It is remarkable how much long-term advantage we have gotten by trying to be consistently not stupid, instead of trying to be very intelligent.
⠀
Once you’ve identified the things that make you feel stranded, you can avoid them. Instead of trying to stuff your days full of white-knuckle-willpower-disciplined-choices, what about just trying to be “consistently not stupid”?
Before you exhaust yourself trying to do all the things that are new and not yet habits, work to gradually avoid the things that make you feel your worst.
When you aren’t constantly making choices that make you feel bad, you’ll be amazed by a natural desire to choose things that make you feel better.
⠀
When you’re ready, feed what makes you fly.⠀
⠀ What makes you feel strong, capable, hopeful, joyful, free and confident?⠀
⠀ How can you incorporate those in the next 24 hours?⠀
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If you aren’t sure, just work on step 1 for a while longer. ⠀
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For me, I feel free when I’m eating clean, when I’m sleeping enough, when I’m making time to have fun and I’m working out with intensity. I feel free when I’m focusing on opportunities & solutions instead of fixating on problems or challenges.
Starve what keeps you stranded. Feed what makes you fly.
Onward with the day – let’s talk about today’s workout & food choices.
When I first looked at today’s workout I thought, “that’s it?” It was a CrossFit benchmark workout called Strict Lynne and it’s all about strength and 2 major movement forms: the push & the pull.
“Strict Lynne”
5 Rounds:
Max Bench Press
Max Strict Pull-ups
Athlete moves directly from Bench Press to Pull-ups. Rest 3:00 between rounds.
Unfortunately, since I’m still allowing my shoulder to recover, I can’t do anything hanging from a bar or really anything overhead. So, I did ring rows instead of pull-ups and it was a tough workout.
I wish I could have stayed to do a metcon afterwards but I had to get to the Jeep dealership for a service appointment.
I did, however, get in some sprints on my Airdyne bike in the afternoon. It totally boosted my energy and improved my mood.
One thing that I think is totally undervalued is our own ability to generate energy. You know that afternoon slump when you’re feeling tired and just want to nap?
We can absolutely generate energy with our thoughts, actions or both. For me, blasting some great music and doing a short sprint workout on my Airdyne in my living room is a game changer!
Don’t settle for low energy. You are in control. Create it.
On the food front:
I don’t usually eat before my workouts but this morning I had bulletproof coffee before heading to the gym. I wasn’t all that hungry but I wasn’t coming home after my workout & I wasn’t sure how long I’d be at the car dealership so I made the call to put a little fuel in my system.
Around 11am I had my cabbage salad bowl with raw cabbage, 2 eggs, 1/2 an avocado and a couple slices of bacon.
Around 2:30 pm I had 2 keto kookies – I shared my thoughts on them on yesterday’s blog.
Dinner was purely the result of a dream I had last night. For some reason, I had a dream about cheesy cauliflower rice. I’ve never made it and I try to limit dairy, but after last night’s dream I decided to give it a try.
Using a bag of cauliflower rice from Trader Joe’s, some ghee (clarified butter) from Thrive Market and some goat cheese, I quite literally made my dream come true. 😉
I had a few ounces of grass fed steak along side it. Pretty tasty. Certainly not bad for a random dream!
I’ve had a few of you guys email me about ghee versus butter versus grassfed butter. Here’s the super short version scoop:
grass fed butter is more nutrient dense than conventional butter
looking at the fat in conventional butter, about 12-15% of it is in the form of short & medium chain triglycerides
grass fed butter and ghee are about 25% short & medium chain triglycerides – these are easier to digest and take a different metabolic pathway than long chain triglycerides. This alternative metabolic pathway means they are less likely to be stored and more likely to be used as an immediate fuel source
ghee is butter with the milk fat removed – that means it doesn’t have lactose & casein (both of which are common allergens)
There are more differences but those are the big ones. Ghee and grassfed butter can be expensive but by far, the best prices I’ve found on ghee are via Thrive Market.
The brand I often buy is Organic Valley Purity Farms. On Amazon, a 13oz jar is $17.20. That same jar is $10.95 on Thrive Market. C’mon now! Those kinds of savings on staples really add up!
In October 2019, our relationship with Thrive Market changed. They decided to put their marketing dollars in avenues outside of podcasting but we still think they’re a good choice if you’re looking to save money on health & personal care products.
To hear more about how I’m working hard to save grocery market by comparing prices on my fat loss friendly staples, take a listen to episode 379 of the Primal Potential podcast.
The book tells a crazy (and true) story about about a group of Hungarian soldiers who became lost in the Alps in the middle of winter.
After two days without word, everyone assumed they were dead. But they returned to their post on the 3rd day, unharmed.
People were shocked that they survived the elements without supplies or communication in the brutal weather.
When they were asked how they survived, one of the men pulled out an old, worn map. He said they used it to navigate home.
But here’s the thing: it wasn’t a map of the Alps. It was a map of the Pyrenees.
WTF? How can you explain that?
Here’s how: the value of the map didn’t come from it’s accuracy. The map was a catalyst for action.
The value of your plan doesn’t come from it’s accuracy. The value of your plan exists only in it’s ability to encourage you to ACT.
We set ourselves up for failure when we give in to inertia and stay where we are, brooding about uncertainty or lack of motivation.
We need to move. We need to go. We must act. We have to resist inertia and just take steps forward.
You will learn from your action.
Planning can stifle action. Preparing can prevent progress.
You don’t need an accurate map or a detailed plan. You just need to take action. Then do it again.
We learn from doing.
Speaking of doing…today’s workout was harder than I thought it would be.. It has been about 6 weeks since I’ve done any running and I could feel it. However, I talked myself through every stride and felt really proud of my effort.
“All Fours”
AMRAP 4
400 Meter Run
27/20 Calorie Bike
Max Power Snatches (75/55)
rest 4 minutes
AMRAP 4
400 Meter Run
21/15 Calorie Bike
Max Power Snatches (95/65)
rest 4 minutes
AMRAP 4
400 Meter Run
15/10 Calorie Bike
Max Power Snatches (115/80)
Instead of power snatches I did power cleans since I’m trying to rest my shoulder. This workout definitely kicked my tail!
On the food front:
I’m getting into quite a rhythm with these cabbage salad bowls eh? Breakfast of champions after today’s workout! Raw shredded cabbage, 2 eggs, bacon and Primal Kitchen Chipotle Lime Mayo.
And – can I tell you how freakin’ pumped I am to get the PK Mayo so much cheaper on Thrive Market!? Seriously! It’s $9.99 at Whole Foods. It’s $13.25 on Amazon and it’s only 7.45 on Thrive Market!! That blows my mind.
Plus, like I announced on episode 379 on the podcast, you can save even more on Thrive thanks to the sweet deal they’re giving Primal Potential fans.
In October 2019, our relationship with Thrive Market changed. They decided to put their marketing dollars in avenues outside of podcasting but we still think they’re a good choice if you’re looking to save money on health & personal care products.
Back to that Primal Kitchen Mayo though – I’m not even a mayo fan but I love this stuff! I use it as a dip for veggies, as a salad dressing and anytime I want to add flavor to meat or veggies. Seriously, it’s awesome.
Back to what I ate today.
Mid-day I had half an avocado with some canned salmon mixed with Primal Kitchen Chipotle Lime Mayo (nope, they don’t pay me to say that, I just love the stuff).
Dinner was a different Chipotle – I headed over to Chipotle Mexican Grill and got a salad with grilled chicken, pico & guac.
I’m pretty excited about today’s episode – it’s about how your perspective might be keeping you from creating success in the areas that matter most to you.
In episode 380 I shared with a listener a statement that has been really powerful in my life:
If you don’t like the story you are in, leave.
If you don’t like the story you are in, you have the power to change it – to create a new one.
Fortunately, I had an experience while traveling this weekend that really brought this to light so we’re going deeper into this idea of story & perspective.
After all, our thoughts are infinitely more powerful than we realize and once we understand the way they are holding us back, we can create stories & beliefs that move us forward.
