Jan 26, 2018 | Blog
You guys. This morning I sat with my cup of coffee and watched episode 1 of Tom Vs Time, the Facebook Watch documentary on Tom Brady (I’ve embedded it at the bottom of this post).
And look, you don’t have to like Tom Brady or the Patriots – you don’t even have to respect him – but there’s not a single one of us who can’t learn something from him or be inspired by his story.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click the play button. Otherwise, keep reading. (I’ve embedded the episode at the bottom of this post, as well.)
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Watching it was such a great start to my day. It got me thinking about how I can be more focused and harder working today. I love those kinds of challenges.
Sure, I’m not a professional athlete and I’m not looking for the level of intensity in my life that Tom Brady chooses for his life, but I do want to win. I do want a great life. And if you’re reading this, I think you do, too.
I don’t watch these kinds of things for entertainment. I see them as tools. How can I use this to make me better? How can I use this to make creating change easier & more fun?
Today I want to share my thoughts on this episode with you and take it from being about Tom Brady to being about all the rest of us.
In the interview, Tom opens by saying:
What are you willing to do and what are you willing to give up to be the best you can be?
The clock is ticking on all of us.
How many people will treat this like a rhetorical question?
It’s not rhetorical. Answer it.
What are you willing to do? What are you willing to give up?
And are you just saying you’re willing? Or are you actually doing it?
The clock is ticking on all of us. For how much longer are you going to choose mediocre when you want excellent?
For how much longer are you going to brush off today and pledge to be better tomorrow?
You’re wasting time.
The clock is ticking.
You might start thinking about things you are willing to give up and then immediately talk yourself out of it because you don’t want to live without sugar or without television or whatever that thing is that you initially thought of.
Look, I get it. But it’s not binary. What are you willing to choose less of? What are you willing to move away from? What are you willing to give less time, energy or money to? Don’t stop pursuing this idea because you don’t like the idea of “giving up forever”.
What are you willing to give up just for today?
What are you willing to dial back on?
Television? Sugar? Alcohol? Gas station food? Vending machine food? Gossiping? Complaining?
What will you do about it today?
“Being mentally tough is about putting all that bullsh*t aside – all that noise, all the hype and just focusing on what you’ve gotta do.”
Amen. In episode 441 of the Primal Potential podcast I talk about no longer participating in the problems of your life, but exclusively participating in solutions.
This Brady quote brings me back to that resolution.
Put it all aside. What everyone else is doing. What went wrong yesterday. The time you’ve wasted. The fears about this weekend or next week or a year from now.
Put it aside and focus on what you’ve gotta do.
One of the daily questions within the Fat Loss Fast Track journal is “What are 3 opportunities I have to win today?”
Focus. Identify today’s opportunities. Act of them.
At one point in the short episode 1 of Tom vs Time he’s talking about the 2016 SuperBowl when they were losing to the Atlanta Falcons. Tom threw an interception and the Falcons scored. He knew that if they lost, that would have been one of the defining plays of the game.
In the episode he calmly says: “It didn’t define the game.”
Guys, we all have that choice.
What just happened doesn’t define your life. The last 30 years don’t define your life. The last 5 years of struggle don’t define your life…
…If you decide to take control and make a change.
You get to choose where your story goes from here. Your health. Your fitness. Your attitude. Focus. Motivation. Progress.
You can either say, “I’ve screwed it all up” and stop trying, or you can bring a new level of effort to this day and create a different outcome. A winning gameplan.
It won’t happen by wishing, hoping and wanting.
There’s no whining. There’s no complaining. Those don’t create change. In fact, they waste your time, energy & opportunity.
You win when you play harder. Try harder. Work harder.
Do you expect to win without trying? Just because you want it?
Are you being a victim of your circumstances saying you can’t win without sacrificing your life? Working hard doesn’t mean you can’t play hard, too.
That’s not true.
But you can’t be a victim.
I’ll leave you with the words of Gisele:
It’s gonna be awesome, I know it, okay?
Take the time to watch Tom Vs Time episode 1! Let me know what you’re going to do with the inspiration you get from it! It’s not enough to be inspired, we have to take action on what moves us.
Get to work!
Jan 25, 2018 | Blog
There’s a song right now that feels like my anthem. I’m sure that in a couple weeks I’ll be onto a new one, but lately, Whatever It Takes by Imagine Dragons is absolutely my anthem.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, just click the play button. Otherwise, keep reading below.
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In episode 441 of the podcast I talked about my recent paradigm shift: I refuse to participate in problems. I’m exclusively interested in solutions.
I think that’s why I feel so connected to Whatever It Takes right now.
It’s so easy to get frustrated or overwhelmed by what seems wrong, broken or simply not what you want it to be.
“Whatever it takes” is a simple mantra and redirect that helps me get to the solution.
For me, it doesn’t mean that I’m hardcore or a badass. I’m really not interested in being either of those things.
I just don’t want to be crippled or slowed by problems & daily irritations.
One of my favorite parts of the song is in the chorus when it says:
Whatever it takes
‘Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the chains in my life. The things that feel like burdens or places where I feel stuck or like I don’t yet have what I want.
I’ve been starting my days by asking the question:
What can I do to break the chains of…
And I fill in the blank with what feels like it’s burdening me.
What can I do today to break the chains of overwhelm?
What can I do today to break the chains of loneliness?
What can I do today to break the chains of sugar cravings?
What can I do today to break the chains of a routine that doesn’t fulfill me?
It feels amazing to break the chains.
Yesterday I signed up for an aerial yoga class.
This week I’m completing Transcendental Meditation instruction.
I’ve started cooking at least one meal every day.
I’ve cleaned out my car.
I’ve reached out to build new friendships.
When I start noticing frustration, unhappiness and overwhelm creep in, I remind myself:
Whatever it takes.
Be part of the solution, not part of the problem.
Break the chains.
What will it take for you to break the chains of habit or unhappiness today?
Get it done.
Whatever it takes.
I’ll leave you with my absolute favorite part of the song:
Hypocritical, egotistical
Don’t wanna be the parenthetical, hypothetical
Working onto something that I’m proud of, out of the box
An epoxy to the world and the vision we’ve lost
I’m an apostrophe
I’m just a symbol to remind you that there’s more to see
I’m just a product of the system, a catastrophe
And yet a masterpiece, and yet I’m half-diseased
And when I am deceased
At least I go down to the grave and die happily
Leave the body of my soul to be a part of me
I do what it takes
Jan 24, 2018 | Blog
You guys. As I write this, there are 7 full days left in January, the first month of 2018.
It’s so easy to start a new year or a new month with amazing intentions and gradually drift from them. Nope! Not me. Not you! Not this year!
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click the play button. Otherwise, keep on readin’ below!
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I have decided to make the rest of my month the very best of my month. Care to join me?
Here are 5 things I am doing to absolutely crush the end of my month. Some of these are new-to-me pledges and others are things I do regularly, but the combination will absolutely help me finish the month on a strong note.
I’m going to cook more.
I’m officiallly in my new tiny house and I am going to use this last week of January to step outside of my box with meals. I’m living on Cape Cod now, so I don’t have the same proximity to Whole Foods as I did just a couple weeks ago. I was in the habit of getting most of my meals from the Whole Foods hot bar & salad bar. Though I’m not much of a cook, I’m going to cook every day through the end of January. I actually started this last night and made an amazing dish from FED + fit: chicken carbonara spaghetti squash casserole. I cannot wait to have the leftovers for lunch today! I highly recommend this one.
This won’t be a complicated pursuit. Making bacon & eggs at home counts. This is a better option than the breakfast bowl at the diner down the road I’ve become a fan of.
I’m going to join a yoga studio.
When I first moved back to New England I started taking hot yoga classes and found them both challenging and peaceful. For months I’ve been thinking about finding another studio and I’m making that happen today.
But of course, joining a studio means very little. Not only will I join, I’ll take 3 yoga classes in this last week of January.
I’ll journal first thing each morning and last thing each night.
I’m a very consistent journaler but sometimes I’m scrambling to fit it in while I’m pouring a cup of coffee. I’ve moved the location of my journal and I’m going to begin every day with intention and end each day with reflection. This simple habit, for me, is the difference between owning my day and letting my day own me.
I’m saying no to sugar.
Here’s what’s true for me: I feel my very best when I’m not eating sugar & artificial sweeteners. But, I’ll often turn to a piece of dark chocolate or sometimes to a protein bar. Not this week. I’m going to choose the best fuel for my body to help me finish the month feeling clear & capable!
I’m cleaning out my car.
After a million trips two and from my new house on Cape Cod, my car is looking a little chaotic. I have cans that need to be deposited and Christmas gifts that need a home. I really believe that the state of the space around me has a huge impact on my mood & mental clarity, so I’m going to clean out & clean my car this weekend.
I know I said 5 things, but as I wrote this, I recognized that I also need to drink more water. This week, I’ll be focusing on drinking at least a few cups of water each day. That’s an improvement for me. There, 6. I’m a rule breaker. 😉
What about you? How can you make the rest of your month the best of your month? Or even the rest of your day the best of your day? The rest of your week the best of your week?
Get clear on what would make you feel your best. It doesn’t have to be 5 things in a week, it could be one. It could be one thing each day.
Whether you started the month strong or not, you can finish strong.
Whether you started the week strong or not, you can finish strong.
Whether you started the day strong or not, you can finish strong.
Make the rest of it the best of it.
Jan 23, 2018 | Blog
I’ve got exciting news for those of you who have an Amazon Echo, Dot or any of those other Amazon gadgets!
I’ve launched Primal Potential Daily Bites as a new Alexa skill! You can hear a new Daily Bite every day!
You might be wondering, “what is an Alexa skill?” I certainly only recently found out myself!
Alexa is Amazon’s version of Apple’s Siri. She’s a digital assistant and Amazon is doing some really cool things with what they call “skills”.
A skill is kind of like an app on your phone or tablet.
One of my favorite ways to take advantage of Alexa skills is by building a “daily briefing”. I have subscribed to a couple skills and each morning I say to Alexa, “Alexa, play my daily briefing” and she plays a short message for me from Primal Potential Daily Bites, Motley Fool Stock Watch, Gary Vee 365 and the weather.
What is Primal Potential Daily Bites?
I answer hundreds of emails every week on everything from motivation, consistency, nutrition for fat loss, cravings, temptation, mindset and everything in between.
Unfortunately, those exchanges happen on a 1:1 level. One person asks a question and my response goes back to that one person.
I know that most of us could be inspired or informed by some of those messages and so I’ll be sharing some short responses on the daily bite! Don’t worry though, I won’t share any personally identifying information from anyone who emails me. I’ll edit my answers to remove any personal references.
We all need moments of encouragement & motivation throughout the day and Primal Potential Daily Bites will give your boost when you need it!
Rest assured: Primal Potential Daily Bites does NOT replace the Primal Potential podcast! This is simply another free tool added to the mix to help you focus & crush your goals.
All you have to do is subscribe to Primal Potential Daily Bites and then, each day, say “Alexa, play my flash briefing!”. Here’s how you do that:
To subscribe to the Primal Potential Daily Bites skill, follow these steps within your Alexa app (download the Alexa app from the app store if you haven’t already).
Hit the icon that looks like 3 horizontal lines in the upper left corner of your phone screen.
Select “Skills” from the menu that pops up.
Type “Primal Potential” in the search box.
Finally, you’ll want to hit “Enable skill” when Primal Potential Daily Bites pops up.
From there, you’re good to go! When you say, “Alexa, play my daily briefing!” you’ll hear the Daily Bite for that day!
Here’s what’s currently part of my daily flash briefing:
I just got my Echo recently (because I couldn’t have an Alexa skill and not have one) so I’m still building my daily briefing and if I add anything awesome, I’ll surely let you know!
This feature is coming soon to Google Home so keep checking there! It’s in progress.
Jan 22, 2018 | Blog
(Announcement below! Make sure to scroll all the way down to read it!)
Too many people feel like they are in a rut. Stuck. Surviving, but not thriving.
Even more people are actually in a rut & just don’t realize it. It’s their normal. Life is not good, but it’s familiar.
Their lives resemble the classic movie Groundhog Day. Dull. Predictable. Average. Expected. Unfulfilling.
They’re drifting through life, not experiencing the amazing life they are capable of creating.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click the play button. Otherwise, keep on reading!
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I started thinking about this when a client emailed me this weekend with a request for our audio coaching channel.
She wanted me to talk about life on the other side of obesity. Life on the other side of depression.
I hit record and started talking off the cuff about the specific ways my life is different without financial debt and obesity.
I explained that big and small moments of making myself proud was like gradually forcing the sun to rise and, as it rose, it couldn’t help but erase the shadows of doubt, shame and insecurity.
It’s not like all of a sudden I woke up and my life was different…
It was literally one small choice at a time brightening that light that made the shadows smaller and smaller.
And that got me thinking about ruts…
When I was obese, I was in a rut. I created that rut by making the same choices and the same excuses day after day.
But I was also capable of choosing my way out of that rut.
Making different choices, one moment at a time, one day at a time, one week at a time.
Not grand plans, but simple, small choices.
Choice by choice climbing out of the rut.
You have to make different choices. You have to choose the anti-rut.
You have to make a different path, paved with different choices.
You have to act differently. Choose differently. Behave differently.
You have to DECIDE that you want to be different and then choose to ACT differently.
You have to seek out ways to make yourself proud every single day. In every single moment. One small thing at a time.
Maybe you make yourself proud in the ways you avoid spending money you don’t need to spend today.
Maybe you make yourself proud by not eating after dinner or by preparing a fat loss friendly dinner instead of ordering out.
You can make yourself proud by choosing not to gossip or complain.
You can make yourself proud by going for a walk instead of watching TV.
Whatever it means for you, it requires doing things differently.
Make different choices.
Try something new.
Take a class. Make a new friend.
When you think you’ve tried everything, remember that you haven’t!
Announcement Time!
Primal Potential Daily Bites is now an Alexa skill! If you have an Echo, Dot or any of those things, you can add Primal Potential Daily Bites to your daily briefing! Here a motivational or coaching note every day! Just go into your Alexa app and search “Primal Potential Daily Bites” and subscribe. Each morning, ask Alexa to play your daily briefing and you’ll hear the Daily Bite!
Jan 19, 2018 | Blog
There’s a question I’ve been asking myself lately when I feel sad, frustrated, lonely or angry. It helps me break out of the emotion & break into a brighter state of mind.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click the pink play button. Otherwise, you can keep reading below.
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I heard the question on a Tara Brach podcast:
What is between me and fully enjoying this moment?
What is it that’s keeping me from enjoying what’s right here, right now?
Usually, what’s keeping me from enjoying a particular moment are my feelings about something that happened in the past or my fear/uncertainty about something that might happen in the future.
Once I’ve recognized what’s between me & enjoying the present moment, I’ll remind myself that I need to leave the past in the past and that I don’t want to miss out on this moment right here because I’m thinking about something that has yet to come.
I was working through this the other day, writing in my journal about what thoughts were negatively impacting my mood in that moment, and the song “Heavy” by Birdtalker came on.
Leave what’s heavy
What’s heavy behind
If your face is down
Take a look around
Do your fingers move?
Do your lungs inflate?
Are you tired are you weary
Of the hidden hate you’ve been holding?
Did you lose that love?
Or have you never had it?
Are you feeling sad cause you did a bad thing?
Leave what’s heavy behind.
Whatever it is that’s weighing you down, you can set it down, even if just for a moment.
You don’t have to carry it in your thoughts all the time.
Leave what’s heavy behind.
If your face is down, take a look around…
What’s good? What’s right? What’s possible?
Pick your head up and travel lighter. Leave what’s heavy behind.
Jan 18, 2018 | Blog
There’s an African proverb that was recently shared with me:
When there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do you no harm.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, just click the play button below. Otherwise, keep on reading below the play bar.
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We are the cause of most of the pain in our lives. Our negativity. Doubts. Fears. Assumptions. Judgements.
When we doubt ourselves or act as our own harshest critic, not only does it slowly erode our happiness and confidence, it magnifies the doubts and criticisms of others.
It’s the root of our fear & insecurity.
But, when we work to eliminate that internal critic, when we work to establish belief in ourselves, our potential and our abilities – when we befriend ourselves, there’s no external critic that can be more powerful than our internal strength and belief.
However, this takes work. Often, we have to actively engage in repairing our relationship with ourselves. In building trust & belief while refusing to engage in negativity.
Though I just heard that African proverb today, it’s been tattooed on my back for years. Literally.
I got the only tattoo I have years ago after a trip to Ghana, Africa. It’s an African symbol that means “no one can do anything to me.”
It’s the same, right?
No one can do anything to me…except me.
If I’m against me, who will be for me?
But if I am militantly on my own side, there’s no one who can hurt me because their words & actions can’t match the power of my internal dialogue.
When you refuse to doubt yourself, you’ll refuse to indulge the doubts of others.
When you refuse to harm yourself, you’ll refuse it from others.
Our greatest obstacles are inside us.
Our greatest potential is within us.
Be militantly on your own side.
Refuse to speak or act against yourself.
It’s your thoughts and fears and doubts that haunt you most. They magnify the words and actions of others. They are the cause of all comparison & judgement.
YOU are the thinker. You are not your thoughts.
When there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do you no harm.
How can you be on your own side today?
What can you do today to build belief in yourself today?
What can you do or not do today to improve the relationship you have with yourself?
Jan 17, 2018 | Blog
The most dangerous excuses are true. The reason they keep winning out over your goals & intentions might be because you realize they are true so you don’t fight against them. You equate “true” and “right”.
If you’d rather listen to this blog than read it, please click play. Otherwise, keep reading below the play bar.
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Here’s a super common example: You’re not going to get that workout in because it’s been a crazy day & you’re completely exhausted.
Yup, the day was crazy. Yup, you’re exhausted.
Because those things are true, you feel justified and validated in your choice to skip the workout.
Or, maybe you pledged to eat better today but you’re feeling really sad & since a cookie will cheer you up, you sit down to 3 handfuls of cookies.
It’s true: you’re sad. You love cookies, so they cheer you up a little.
Since those things are true, the cookies are now validated and you commence eating them.
The behavior makes sense to you. You’ve used an argument that not only makes sense, but gives you what you want in the moment.
It doesn’t, however, give you want you want in the long term or consider the entire truth of the situation, choice and consequences.
Because the best excuses are true, we’ve got to train ourselves to consider what else is true.
Just because something is true doesn’t mean it’s the most true thing or the only true thing.
We’ve got to stop making assumptions & choosing the most convenient truth.
When it comes to making choices & pursuing our goals, we often don’t tell ourselves the whole truth. We don’t even consider the whole truth.
It’s time to slow down, work to be less impulsive, less reactive and consider the whole picture.
For example, you might not want to get out of bed and get to work on time when you first wake.
Though your first impulse might be “I’m tired, I don’t want to go to work“, you consider the whole truth and the implications of that decision before making it.
You get up & go to work because avoiding the negative repercussions of staying home is more valuable than the momentary pleasure of staying in bed.
We can train ourselves to think that way more often.
In the case of skipping a workout because you’re tired, when you ask yourself what else is true, you might recognize that you’ll feel more energy after a workout. You might realize that working out will help you sleep better tonight so you can be more rested tomorrow. Or that increasing your fitness increases your energy long term so you don’t continue to feel like you’re at the mercy of your fatigue.
When you’re debating the cookies because you’re sad & it’s been a crazy day, you might realize that not making progress towards your goals makes you feel really sad, therefore choosing the cookies will ultimately make you more sad than taking great care of yourself. In fact, taking great care of yourself and making quality food choices improves your mood & confidence. You might also realize that eating well can’t be predicated on the type of day you’ve had or you’ll never create the consistency needed to make progress towards your goals. You might realize that food is the solution to hunger, not the solution to stress.
Don’t accept an excuse simply because it’s true.
Slow down and ask yourself: is this the full truth?
What else is true?
How does this choice impact what I want most?
How will I feel about this choice tomorrow?
Is this choice going to take me where I want to go?
How can I meet myself in the middle?
What would be an improved choice?
How can I make myself proud?
Just for today, how can I make a great choice?
Is this an opportunity to be seized or a temptation to be resisted?
True doesn’t always mean right.
Jan 16, 2018 | Blog
The other day, as I was scrolling through Instagram, I stopped on a question from author Elizabeth Gilbert.
(To listen to this blog instead of read it, just press play or you can keep reading below.)
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What are you willing to give up in order to have what you keep saying you want?
I fight hard to resist the tendency to simply scroll by something that inspires me without allowing it to influence or change me. These moments are opportunities and we’ll get out of them what we put into them.
Instead of just jumping to an answer without much thought, I decided I needed to break it down by first looking at what things I want but don’t yet have.
What are the things you want but don’t yet have?
Then, from that list I asked myself what I want most.
Of all the things on the list, which is most important to me? Which would have the most positive impact on my life?
Then I could get back to Gilbert’s question:
What are you willing to give up in order to have what you keep saying you want?
But of course, talk is cheap. It’s easy to say what you’re willing or able to give up but the only thing that matters is what you’ll actually limit or eliminate.
Your intentions won’t create change.
I found it helpful to break it down a bit more simply:
What am I willing to give up today in order to have what I keep saying I want?
Today, I’m willing to give up television. Today, I’m willing to give up sugar. Today, I’m willing to give up snacking. Today, I’m willing to give up eating when I’m not truly hungry. I’m willing to give up complaining.
What are you willing to give up today in order to have what you keep saying you want?
