Hey my sweet friends! I wanted to take a few minutes today to share with you some personal answers to your most common questions on motivation. I will be the first to say that I am a work in progress and I have many of the same challenges & frustrations you do!
I absolutely have days when I’m not motivated and I practice new & different strategies to break through those moments instead of feeling like I’m a victim of them. If you have more questions, be sure to let me know and I’ll happily answer! Make today great!
Question: I have a long history of dieting & weight loss failure, like you do. How did you stop focusing on those failures so you could move forward without beating yourself up?
Ah yes, decades of failed attempts. Here’s how I choose to see it: I have a massive backlog of data to help me quickly identify what doesn’t work.
As clichè as it is, think about how many failed attempts Thomas Edison had when inventing the light bulb. Over 1,000! Here’s the beauty of this: every single attempt made him smarter & better while bringing him closer to his goal. Why do we choose to see failed attempts at weight loss as making us weak and hopeless? They are powerful tools if we choose to see them as such, just as failed attempts at inventing the light bulb were!
I’m a bit of an odd-ball – I am super emotional but also a very strategic thinker. Using the strategic part of my brain I’ll ask, “does it help me to focus on how sad it is that it took me so long to get serious about the consistent action towards my goals?” No. It doesn’t help. It’s a distraction. I’ve wasted enough time and I don’t want to waste anymore.
I learn and I move forward. That’s all I’m interested in. I spent decades feeling like crap. I’m not creating that anymore. Onward ever, backward never.
I have a limited amount of energy & attention. I constantly remind myself to put it towards things that move me forward.
Question: Do you ever have bad days? How do you handle them?
Absolutely! I make food choices I don’t feel good about. I worry about my business. I feel sad. I feel lonely. I drop the ball and let myself down.
Part of how I handle them is by reminding myself that it’s just part of the human experience. My goal is not have perfect days. I haven’t failed when I have an imperfect day. This is life. Welcome to it.
So first, I don’t manufacture all sorts of drama with thoughts and words like, “what is wrong with me!? I suck!” When I find myself manufacturing that kind of unproductive drama, I shut it down. I literally tell myself, “Enough, Elizabeth. You’re being dramatic. Move forward.”
Typically, I’ll look at what I need. More often than not, if I’m having a bad day I’m either tired, not organized or I haven’t prioritized the things that make me feel happy & productive. I’ll identify what is “wrong” and then get started looking at what I’m willing to do to fix it.
Question: What do you do when you aren’t feeling motivated?
First, I’ll make a list of all the possible things I could do to move in the direction of my goals. It’s not a list of the things I want to do, just a list of all the options. The list might be 20+ items long.
Then, I’ll circle all the ones I’m capable of doing on that day. The things that are feasible given my schedule.
After that, I’ll highlight the things I’m willing to do and get to work on those things that will move me towards my goals, that I’m capable of and willing to do. It really helps to see all the options, to know that I don’t have to do them all and to be able to choose which ones I can do & am willing to do.
Question: How do you respond when you feel overwhelmed?
One of the most powerful things I remind myself of is that being overwhelmed is not a function of having too much to do – it’s a function of not being focused on what to do now or next.
Yes, I might (and usually do) have 687 things to do. However, they can’t all be done now and they don’t all have to be done now.
What has to happen now or next? Stop planning, stop freaking out, stop complaining and do that next thing now.
Question: Have you always been a morning person? Do you have any tips on how I can become a morning person?
I have never been a night owl but I haven’t always been a morning person. When I was at my heaviest, I wasn’t an any time person! I was pretty miserable and exhausted all day every day!
One of the biggest recommendations I have for folks who want to be more of a morning person is to stop prioritizing TV and internet at night. We get sucked into our electronics and stay up too late.
Put away your devices and pay attention to when you feel tired. The best thing you can do in response to that feeling is go to bed. That’s one of the best ways to become a morning person!
Question: How do you respond to people in your life who don’t support your goals or habits?
I struggled with this one for a long time and I’m glad to say it’s far easier for me now because I remind myself of one critical fact: I am the only one in control of what and how much I put in my mouth.
I don’t need anyone’s approval or permission to take care of myself. I have to do what makes me feel my best and that is 100% in my control – no one else’s.
Question: Do you always feel like you’re getting results? Do you ever feel frustrated that the results aren’t there the way you want them to be?
No, I don’t always feel like I’m getting results and yes it can be frustrating. When I have moments of frustration I’ll ask myself, “What is right for your body? What is right for your health?” I’ll literally write out those answers and then do those things.
Here’s one hard & fast commitment I’ve made to myself – I will be more attached to the process than to the results. I will do the work because the work is right for my body and I will try to do what is right each day.
If I commit to the process, the results will come. I keep my head down and do the work. Period.
Question: How do you break out of a cycle of bad food choices after something like a tough weekend?
I will think about a fat loss friendly meal I’ll absolutely love and take my time in creating & enjoying it. Sometimes I lose touch with how amazing it feels to eat foods I love that love me back.
Maybe I’ll make my spaghetti squash primavera with cashew basil pesto or a beautiful burger with bacon & avocado. Either way, I’ll patiently and presently prepare a fat loss friendly meal and give it my full attention as I enjoy it.
I’ll remind myself how amazing it feels to make amazing choices and how it actually feels a whole lot better than overindulging in foods that don’t make me feel so great!
The Primal Potential podcast is your podcast. I want to help you overcome your struggles & challenges. I want to help you reach your unique goals. This week, it’s been obvious that many people are struggling with their evening eating habits so today I’m sharing 4 strategies to help you tackle nighttime eating!
I know that many of you feel in control all day long but out of control at night.
I know that many of you are frustrated with the choices you make night but don’t know how to take control and make meaningful improvements that stick.
Don’t miss today’s podcast on 4 ways to improve your evening eating habits!
In today’s episode I detail the follow 4 ways to improve your evening eating habits, take control of the night time and make faster progress towards your goals:
Change your expectations
Identify what represents an improvement for you (just for today)
Sometimes we think we can out-smart ourselves. We think that with enough willpower, grit & determination, we can out-smart ourselves. I don’t think that’s too effective.
I want to help you work WITH yourself, not against yourself. In today’s episode, I want to help you conquer inconsistency and self-sabotage but helping you understand why we so often give in and what we can do to be more strategic in our approach.
Today is all about how your subconscious works. In short, it will always look to avoid pain and seek pleasure. This is simply part of how we are wired for survival.
This can work powerfully in our favor or staunchly against us, depending on what we do and how we think.
Unfortunately, most people have, through years of failed diets and giving up on themselves, associated far more pain with the achievement of their goals than pleasure. Today, we’re changing that.
Making some straight-forward adjustments to how you think about your goal can accelerate your progress and improve your life!
One of the first strategies I talk about in today’s episode is identifying your existing pleasure & pain associations. First, establish your goal. Then, free associate all the painful or negative words, thoughts & feelings associated with the achievement of that goal. Then, free associate all of the positive words, thoughts & feelings associated with the achievement of that goal.
Then identify the opposite of your goal and go through the same process – create a list of all the positive and negative associations you have with whatever is opposite your goal.
Intentionally build the list of pleasurable associations related to the achievement & pursuit of your goal.
“You can’t change what’s going on around you until you start changing what’s going on within you” ~ Zig Ziglar
Don’t be a part of the problem, be a part of the solution.
Focus as much of your energy as possible on what you can do to make the achievement of your goal positive, exciting and fulfilling. Stop putting energy towards why it’s hard, frustrating or negative.
Whether you’re working out regularly or you haven’t yet incorporated it into your lifestyle, today we’re going to tackle 6 simple ways to get more out of your workout! No matter what we spend our time & energy doing, we want to make sure we’re getting as much from it as possible!
While exercise isn’t the be-all-end-all of fat burning and physique improvement, it does have the power to accelerate our progress, improve mood and help us get healthy – let’s just make sure we’re being as efficient as possible.
It doesn’t matter if you have a gym membership or not, it doesn’t matter if you love working out or you don’t – these 6 ways to get more out of your workout will help you get to the next level!
Before we dive into those 6 strategies that will allow you to get more out of your workout, a few caveats for those who are resistant to change or for those who haven’t yet incorporated fitness into their routine.
It’s important to remember that fitness is not the important element of fat loss or physique improvement. In today’s episode I’ll talk about how we the primary drivers of fat loss include:
Your attitude & perspective
What and how much you eat
Stress & sleep
The important thing to keep in mind is that exercise shouldn’t be a punishment or something we dread. Just like the key to long term success with nutrition is finding foods you love that love you back, it’s critical that you experiment with different activities to find what you love, enjoy & look forward to.
Over the long term, we won’t consistently do that which we don’t enjoy.
Onto those 6 strategies that will help you get more out of your workout – I go into a whole lot detail on the “how” in today’s episode so make sure to listen to the full show!
Get consistent (this episode tells you how)
Add a leisure walk after your workout (the “why” here is very science-based)
Decrease the duration & increase the intensity
Go heavier
Switch the stimulus
Incorporate micro movement
I told you guys I’d share what equipment I have at home. You absolutely don’t need any of this, but I find I can do just about any workout I want and get a whole-body workout with these few things.
If you want to incorporate a little bit of movement without any equipment, here’s one of my fave workouts to do without any equipment:
Complete 5 rounds for time of the following:
20 body weight squats
15 sit-ups
10 burpees
5 push-ups
If you have a jumprope, one of my faves is to accumulate 1000 jumps as fast as possible. You can start by doing sets of 50, resting when needed. If 1000 seems daunting, do what doesn’t seem daunting. You could start by accumulating just 100 jumps. Start where you need to, work up your skill with each workout.
If you have some equipment at home, try this short one.
Set a timer for 15 minutes and do as many rounds as possible of the following before time expires:
I’ve talked a lot about FOMO (fear of missing out) on the podcast – you can listen to an episode all about it here – but it keeps coming up again and again. So, I’ll keep talking about it, again and again.
I’m just gonna shoot straight, as if you were right here next to me on a bar stool sitting at the counter. I’m sipping my cold brew with a glass straw because that’s how I roll and you’re having a hard time making food choices that are aligned with your goals because you feel like you’re missing out on “everything” (warning: you just might be manufacturing a teeny bit of drama with that perspective, but I’ll totally let it slide).
So first of all – c’mon – stop focusing on everything you feel like you “can’t have”. Obviously you can have whatever you want, but that’s not the point here.
What DO you want? What IS important to you? What matters most? I’m gonna go out on a limb and suggest it’s not cookies and wine but maybe confidence, freedom from food obsession and to look and feel amazing.
Do you realize how dramatically your life and happiness would change if you focused on THAT more than on everything you feel you’re missing?
Do you realize that when you say “yes” to all those things you don’t want to miss out on, you’re choosing to miss out on what you just told me you actually want?
How ’bout some FOMO in THATdirection?
Change your mind an inch and you’ll change your world a mile.
The second thing I’d ask you is, “Are you eating foods you love or are you forcing yourself to eat healthy foods and thinking about all the things you’d rather have?”
I’m gonna keep it real because I’ve been where you’re at – if you aren’t taking the time to identify and prioritize foods you love that are also aligned with your goals, you won’t be able to sustain your approach.
Sure, you might be able to white-knuckle your way to fat loss choking down dry chicken breasts and boat loads of broccoli but you won’t maintain your results.
If you aren’t eating foods you love that love you back, you’re going to struggle. You’ll probably be on-again-off-again and you won’t be very happy. But I think you know that already. The question is, are you ready to do something about it?
Are you ready to change your perspective on FOMO? Are you ready to embrace foods you love that love you back and invest the time in understanding what that means for YOU?
Before you get all tripped out in your head – this does NOT mean you need to buy expensive foods and spend hours prepping and cooking. I certainly don’t! Let me give you an example of a fat loss friendly meal I enjoyed the heck out of (so much so it actually felt like an indulgence and I cannot wait to enjoy the leftovers today!)
Spaghetti Squash Primavera with Basil Cashew Pesto
Ready for this one? Spaghetti squash primavera with cashew basil pesto & merguez sausage!
It sounds fancy but it’s not. I’ll prove it to you!
Let’s talk about the pesto. First, I made it myself. Second, it took about 5 minutes. I’ve been using it as a salad dressing, mixed into veggies like with this squash and I might be flat out eating it off the spoon when I want a snack.
Here’s what you’ll need for the basil cashew pesto:
fresh basil
unsalted cashews
garlic cloves
extra virgin olive oil
salt
Now, when I cook, I cook for 1 but I also cook to have leftovers (so I don’t cook as often). I’m going to give you ratios for this recipe so you can scale it according to how much you make.
2 parts loosely packed fresh basil leaves
1 part extra virgin olive oil
1 part cashews
garlic
salt
Here’s how I made it
2 cups loosely packed basil leaves
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
1 cup cashews
2 raw garlic cloves
1 tsp salt
I tossed all that in my Vitamix blender and then into the fridge. I actually made this a couple days before this spaghetti squash primavera and decided at the last minute that it would add tons of flavor! More on the pesto in a minute.
Spaghetti squash is super easy. I’m not a gourmet cook or a recipe writer but, like I said, we’re just chatting in my kitchen so I’ll happily tell you what I did.
I cut the squash in half length-wise and scrape out the seeds with a spoon then drizzled the inside of the squash with olive oil. After lining a baking sheet with foil (fewer dishes to wash!), I put the squash face down on the foil.
I popped mine in a 350 degree oven for about 25 minutes. If you want your squash more tender, you can cook it longer, but you should probably google it because if you cook a small squash for 25 minutes, it might be mushy. Mine was a big guy and I always kind of wing it. Basically, I take it out when I’m tired of waiting. (I told you! I’m not a cook!)
While the squash was cooking, I had 2 skillets on the stove. In one, I was cooking 1 link of merguez sausage I’d picked up from the farmers’ market. You could use absolutely any protein. Ground beef, grilled chicken, chicken thighs, chicken sausage – whatever your hungry heart desires! Heck, got leftovers? Use that and skip a step!
In the other skillet, I warmed some olive oil before adding 2 chopped cloves of garlic and a sliced sweet onion. I let them cook down, stirring occasionally while the squash and sausage cooked. (I was not tending to this stuff, I was going back & forth into the living room paying far more attention to Netflix than to this low-maintenance dinner prep).
(Yes, clearly this a high-garlic meal. Don’t like garlic? Skip it! Recipes are suggestions, my friends. Just suggestions.)
Once the squash was done, I grabbed a potholder and a fork to scrape it right into my bowl. Yup, I ate one half of the squash all by myself! All the veggies, please! I added about 1 tbsp of the basil cashew pesto to the squash and stirred it all up, the heat from the squash melting the pesto a bit, as it had solidified a bit in the fridge.
I topped the bowl with half of the onion/garlic mixture, then about 6 sliced (raw) cherry tomatoes, the sausage and sprinkled the whole thing with a few garlic chips I had recently bought at a gourmet market (it’s just toasted garlic slices).
It was amazing. I have the other half in the fridge for today, all I have to do is slice up a couple tomatoes and cook another sausage link!
I didn’t feel deprived, I didn’t feel stuffed, every single bite felt like an indulgence.
Did I want dark chocolate afterwards? Yup, I did. I thought about it and asked myself, “just for today, can I pass on that?” Yup, I can.
I asked myself, “When you’re in bed tonight, would you be more glad that you enjoyed the chocolate or more glad that you passed on it?”
I’d be more glad if I passed on it.
Well, I’m in the business of feeling good, making myself proud and eating foods I love that love me back so the chocolate choice was a no brainer!
Here’s to finding foods you love that love you back!
